Need help figuring out adoption relationships? Schedule a complimentary consultation with Lori Holden, M.A.

Perfect Moment Monday: Feelings…Whoa, Whoa. Whoa Feelings

Regular readers know that music makes me emote. A lot and often. Good thing I don’t have to pay every time I post a music video.

This week while driving, an old song came on, one I hadn’t heard in maybe a decade or more. This is a song that, at various times, has brought me to soaring heights with teenage giddiness, and to my knees in desperation.

It all depended on Doug.

I wrote about Doug nostalgically here, and hatefully here (via journal image). Doug was my first boyfriend, and the very first time he said to me the long-awaited words “I love you,” it was under the guise of singing this song to me.

(I feel so silly posting this, seeing the very dated video.)

Hearing that song took me back. To the first time a human being not related to me professed love for me. To sneaking kisses near a locker during passing period. To feeling like I’d arrived because a boy wanted to hold my hand in public. To that sweet and angsty anticipation of seeing each other after any absence of more than 20 minutes.

And to the disbelief and anger of yet aNOTHER breakup. To the flopping on my bed and crying for HOURS, knowing that I would NEVER, EVER get over him and love another. To the fear that my life, at 15, was OVER.

But instead of me being the actress in the scene, this week I was the audience. The song evoked in me briefly feelings of euphoria and despair — the same ones the 15 year old experienced.

If I hadn’t been driving, I’d have applauded her ability to feel her emotions so deeply.

But instead I laughed. The show was over and I could encore the actress if I wanted, or leave the theater if I chose.

A perfect moment of reclaiming some power I’d once allowed someone else to take.

~~~~~

Perfect Moment Monday is about noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between.

On the last Monday of each month we engage in mindfulness about something that is right with our world. Everyone is welcome to join.

To participate in Perfect Moment Monday:

  • Follow LavenderLuz.com.
  • Write up your own Perfect Moment and post it on your blog (or other site).
  • Use LinkyTools below to enter your name (or blog name), the URL of your Perfect Moment post, and a thumbnail image if desired. (NEW: you can now put LinkyTools on your own Perfect Moment Monday post. Just click Get the Code Here and add the code to your own post. All the linkies will show up on your blog, too.)
  • Visit the Perfect Moments of others and let the writers know you were there with some comment currency.

With your Perfect Moment post , you may place this button on your blog (in the post, on the sidebar, or both).

This is also a Twisted Mix bloghop.

31 Responses

  1. Cause She’s A Brick House, Mighty Mighty, just letting it all hang out!!Great reflection on young love.

  2. Cause She’s A Brick House, Mighty Mighty, just letting it all hang out!!Great reflection on young love.

  3. I love this moment. You captured it so well and I’m so glad you were able to reclaim that power. My Perfect Moment is on my annoyingly private blog. Thanks for prompting me to share it here.

  4. That was a perfect moment. It is crazy how one song can put you back to any moment that you link it with. I think that is what is so great about music.BTW congrats on your 400th post!

  5. And just think, in a few years you’ll be helping Tessa through this (if she lets you help). I wonder what her song will be. Just remember not to laugh.

  6. I love this line “To feeling like I’d arrived because a boy wanted to hold my hand in public.” That is exactly how it felt the first time I had a boyfriend. You said it perfectly.I know my tweet sounds lame but (1) it is harder to work with 140 characters AND include the link than it is to write a full post and (2) I purchased the wrong detergent and if I hadn’t found the extra bottle with enough for one load, I would have had to return to the store. And I’ve already moved into pyjamas because I’m feeling sick so this was truly a perfect moment.

  7. music is a driving force in my life…it helps me process things…so i am right there with you…my first participation…:)

  8. You always remind me to listen to music more often. I have been meaning to participate for ages. I finally have a Perfect moment up.Thank you for this opportunity to notice, reflect and enjoy..

  9. what a perfect perfect moment! mine happened last night. after a weekend filled with enough live music to make me feel like I was in my 20s again, I saw two of my favorite musicians play together at a tiny club. I sat just 10 feet from their feet, watching their smiling faces and seeing their tics up close, hearing their quiet banter in between songs. awed as their fingers flew up and down those chords, I sat with my beloved and listened, both of us smiling as I felt my spirit open to joy.

  10. I love this moment. You captured it so well and I’m so glad you were able to reclaim that power. My Perfect Moment is on my annoyingly private blog. Thanks for prompting me to share it here.

  11. That was a perfect moment. It is crazy how one song can put you back to any moment that you link it with. I think that is what is so great about music.BTW congrats on your 400th post!

  12. And just think, in a few years you’ll be helping Tessa through this (if she lets you help). I wonder what her song will be. Just remember not to laugh.

  13. I love this line “To feeling like I’d arrived because a boy wanted to hold my hand in public.” That is exactly how it felt the first time I had a boyfriend. You said it perfectly.I know my tweet sounds lame but (1) it is harder to work with 140 characters AND include the link than it is to write a full post and (2) I purchased the wrong detergent and if I hadn’t found the extra bottle with enough for one load, I would have had to return to the store. And I’ve already moved into pyjamas because I’m feeling sick so this was truly a perfect moment.

  14. music is a driving force in my life…it helps me process things…so i am right there with you…my first participation…:)

  15. You always remind me to listen to music more often. I have been meaning to participate for ages. I finally have a Perfect moment up.Thank you for this opportunity to notice, reflect and enjoy..

  16. what a perfect perfect moment! mine happened last night. after a weekend filled with enough live music to make me feel like I was in my 20s again, I saw two of my favorite musicians play together at a tiny club. I sat just 10 feet from their feet, watching their smiling faces and seeing their tics up close, hearing their quiet banter in between songs. awed as their fingers flew up and down those chords, I sat with my beloved and listened, both of us smiling as I felt my spirit open to joy.

  17. My perfect moment…well…on Sunday morning I woke up to snowflakes on the driveway. By afternoon it was 60 degrees and I was out for a walk. That’s perfect. ICLW

  18. Isn’t it amazing how some songs can take us right back to another place and time. I remember this one well and “Endless Love”. I think we’ve all been there. If only we’d have known it was all for the best. Thank you for sharing. Maybe that’s why as females we turn into such strong women.

  19. Now THAT is a PERFECT MOMENT! I’ve got mine all ready for next week!! WOOHOO!Thank you for the love at the guest post! ONE OF THESE DAYS I’ll finally get to attend a shinding and we’ll meet!

  20. My perfect moment…well…on Sunday morning I woke up to snowflakes on the driveway. By afternoon it was 60 degrees and I was out for a walk. That’s perfect. ICLW

  21. Isn’t it amazing how some songs can take us right back to another place and time. I remember this one well and “Endless Love”. I think we’ve all been there. If only we’d have known it was all for the best. Thank you for sharing. Maybe that’s why as females we turn into such strong women.

  22. Now THAT is a PERFECT MOMENT! I’ve got mine all ready for next week!! WOOHOO!Thank you for the love at the guest post! ONE OF THESE DAYS I’ll finally get to attend a shinding and we’ll meet!

  23. Lori,
    I love that you played with us today and what an awesome post. You are so cool. Ah, I remember those days of dying in anticipation when separated for more than 20 minutes. Regarding your 15-year old self and feeling those old emotions so deeply recently – I still think you should applaud yourself for feeling AND also for being able to laugh instead of flopping on your bed in angst. Awesome stuff, friend! This line gave me chills: A perfect moment of reclaiming some power I’d once allowed someone else to take.

  24. I love this post! And the song of course too!!! You do such an amazing job of telling that story we all knew so well. That butterfly feeling that borders on queasiness. I was right there with you! It made me think a little of Taylor Swift “We are never getting back together” not my usual genre but I do appreciate her!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *