Perfect Moment Monday: Good son

August 1, 2010

in Perfect Moment

Perfect Moment Monday is about noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between.

Once a week we engage in mindfulness about something that is right with our world. Everyone is welcome to join. Details on how to participate are at the bottom of this post, complete with bloggy bling.

Please visit the links of the participants at the bottom.

Here’s a perfect moment from my week. I hope you’ll share yours, too.


It’s one thing to see my husband, day-in, day-out, as a spouse and father.  I sometimes forget to even notice all he is and does for our family.

But this week, I saw Roger in a new light: as a son. We have been visiting his mom, who calls herself Grandma Marshmallow, but whom we call Grandma Lisa.

Grandma Lisa was diagnosed earlier this summer with Stage 4 lung cancer.

Obvious statement alert…cancer sucks.
Understatement alert…chemo sucks.

Roger has worked tirelessly during his extended stay to cook for his mom, to fix up her bathroom with bars and handles, clean out her attic, groom her yard, shop for groceries, cheer her on, nourish her soul.

She entered the room after a nap yesterday and he greeted her cheerfully with the simple words, “Hi, Mom,” delighted to see her.

And witnessing tenderness in his voice, the latest in a long string of kind words and deeds, I experienced a perfect moment, just by noticing how extra-ordinary my husband is.

I suspect he gets it from his mom.


To participate in Perfect Moment Monday:

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{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

Mama Bird August 1, 2010 at 8:43 pm

Oh, Lori. I guess it’s been awhile since I’ve visited… I had no idea. Sending you, your amazing husband and his sweet mom lots of love and prayers. Much strength to all of you.


Lavender Luz August 1, 2010 at 10:13 pm

No worries, Chris. This is the first mention of it here. Thanks for your kind words, coming from someone who knows all too well.


Baby Smiling In Back Seat August 1, 2010 at 10:21 pm

I have seen Roger and his mom together, and the impression that I got was that he is an incredibly good son.

So sorry to hear about Lisa’s cancer.


Kristin August 1, 2010 at 11:12 pm

That picture is absolutely amazing and it brought tears to my eyes. My thoughts and prayers are with you as she battles this horrid disease.


Rachel August 2, 2010 at 5:44 am

WOW what a touching post…. and I thing its enlighting to see others in a light we dont normally see them….
The photo says it all…. and is very symbolic ….. a Sons Love for his Mother….


Genevieve August 2, 2010 at 5:54 am

This was so touching…my mother-in-law is struggling with cancer, and my aunt just finished treatments….so difficult. My heart goes out to you all. And that photo is amazingly precious.


Suzy August 2, 2010 at 6:36 am

What a precious picture. And how amazing it is that when we get to see our husbands being a compassionate son.

Sending prayers to your MIL and your family. And yes, cancer does suck!



Kir August 2, 2010 at 7:32 am

Oh Lori, perfect indeed…and so moving, that picture touched my heart.
My heart and prayers to your family right now…go Grandma Marshmallow! You are a beautiful woman.

thanks for sharing this with us.,…and know I am thinking of you.


Sheri August 2, 2010 at 7:46 am

I still have tears in my eyes from your wonderful Perfect Moment description to the touching picture.

I’ve seen Roger in so many roles…and (understatement alert), he is wonderful.

I’m sending Lisa and the rest of the family loving, healing energy.


May August 2, 2010 at 10:59 am

What a beautiful photo.

I often scroll through many comments describing teariness as I sit, dry-eyed. Not today!! (sniff)


Luna August 2, 2010 at 1:56 pm

Cancer does suck. But Roger is wonderful to be so present (and supportive) of his mom at such an awful time. Love to you all. Xo


Alana-isms August 2, 2010 at 6:34 pm

I too had misty eyes upon viewing your sweet photograph.

Hugs and well wishes to Grandma Lisa.

And kudos to your husband for being the amazing, giving person he is. What a great “perfect moment” seeing him take care of his mama.


Lori Lavender Luz August 2, 2010 at 9:10 pm

Thanks to each one of your. I will pass on your good wishes to Grandma Lisa. I might even show her this post!


My Reality August 3, 2010 at 7:56 pm

What a touching photo. I hope your MIL fares ok with her treatment. Cancer sucks, so does the treatment. She is lucky to have such a wonderful family supporting her.


Kami August 4, 2010 at 12:26 pm

Oh, wow, what a sweet story. I don’t have that kind of relationship with my mom. He may be a good son, but I bet she is a good mother too.

Uh, not that my mom isn’t good . . . she does the best that she can. Gosh, now you have me thinking about why my relationship with my mother isn’t better and how I may contribute to that. The natural extension to that is and how I might foster a good relationship with my daughters

Lori, I don’t have time for this! I have too much to get done today. Once again, a thought-spurring post. Perhaps I will have time to ponder it and the post about it.


mrs spock August 7, 2010 at 6:43 pm

And one day, no doubt, your own kids will be the “good ones” doing what they’ve seen their parents do.


Erica August 8, 2010 at 6:50 pm

Wonderful picture and post. Wishing her the best.


yaya the writa' August 8, 2010 at 7:43 pm

Sometimes, it takes the worst situation to bring out the best in us. Blessings to all of you.

~ Yaya


Geochick August 9, 2010 at 2:33 pm

I’m sorry about Roger’s mom. It must all-around suck. But what a great photo – it’s perfect!

p.s. Do they ever find lung cancer before stage IV? This is the third woman I’ve heard about in the last 2 years being diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer. Scary.


Lavender Luz August 9, 2010 at 3:39 pm

Lung cancer is a sneaky one. It easily moves to other organs and areas before becoming symptomatic. I’m sorry to hear this is around you even more :-(.

Thanks for your kind words.


RadiAunt August 14, 2010 at 9:51 pm

A beautiful moment shared between mother and son . . . A “Count Your Blessings” moment for all of us . . . Roger’s our hero, as is his mom. Love to all.


Lavender Luz August 15, 2010 at 4:55 pm

I love you, RadiAunt! Thanks so much for visiting and leaving such a beautiful comment <3.


RadiAunt August 16, 2010 at 7:54 am

You know, “they” say you can tell everything you need to know about a man, by the way he treats his mother . . . aren’t you lucky? Keeping all in our prayers.

andy August 21, 2010 at 6:15 pm

Awesome moment.


WiseGuy August 22, 2010 at 12:43 am

As late as I am in reading up your back posts…this one really touched me.

I am happy that you married such a nice human being.

I am not sure of what Grandma Lisa’s prognosis is, but I pray for healing for her.

It is hard for a family to see a loved one being snatched by any evil disease.


Christi Pulley September 16, 2011 at 3:21 pm

I stumbled across your blog and became an instant fan. I am a birthmother who placed my daughter for adoption in 1995. As you know, back then open adoption was most certainly not common. I was blessed to meet the most amazing parents for my daughter. Her mother, as I am my daughter’s “Christi”, and I became very close because our relationship was based and founded upon respect, trust and honesty. Our adoption was very open…..and it was from the start.

I am posting on this portion of your blog because sadly, my daughter’s mother passed away in December 2010 from breast cancer. She was a big part of my life as well and I miss her dearly.

Thank you for advocating so relentlessly for open adoption. As a birthmother, my adoption being open made the healing easier..the scar is always there but the pain, sadness, and grief was worth it because I was doing what was best for my daughter and I had the opportunity to witness that first hand because of the open adoption. It is a gift that I’ll forever cherish as I know that wasn’t a choice they had to make but they did because they felt it was best for my daughter and in the end that’s what mattered most.

Warm and kind regards,


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