adoptive parenting tips

Advice for New Adoptive Parents

Crib Sheet from Pampers

This article, from Pampers’ Absolute Beginner series, is geared specifically for people who come to parenthood via adoption.

Crib sheetIn this handy pdf you’ll find answers to common questions like:

  • How to get through various stages of “The Wait.”
  • How to get ready for your new child.
  • When to tell people.
  • What you need to know about PADS, post-adoption depression syndrome.
  • When and how to tell your child about her adoption.
  • What to do when you fear you are an imposter.

adoptive parenting tipsClick over for Pampers’ Crib Sheet.

What do you wish you’d known in the early days of your adoption? What advice would you give to someone just starting out on the adoption road?


Lori Holden's book coverLori Holden, mom of a teen son and a teen daughter, blogs from Denver. Her book, The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole, is available through your favorite online bookseller and makes a thoughtful anytime gift for the adoptive families in your life.


7 thoughts on “Advice for New Adoptive Parents”

  1. Great job! Love this:

    “Does this mean you’re not the real mother? Does another mother’s existence negate your own? Nope—she is real AND you are real. Get comfortable with and confident in your own real, unique, and vital role in your child’s life. Keep changing those diapers, attending those nighttime feedings, and singing those lullabies: You’re a real mom now.”

  2. Thank you so much for writing this post, Lori. It motivated me in such a positive way when I wrote about our personal journey, and it was comforting to know that so many of the feelings and emotions I felt while waiting for (and then parenting) my daughter were normal. You are such an inspiration!

  3. I love the advice about telling the adoption story. I have a friend who is adopted and she appreciates the way that her parents handled telling her…it was exactly the way that you suggested. She never had the talk, it just always was something she knew.

  4. It’s a great crib sheet. I always find the advice for bearing the wait to be the trickiest to talk about. Logically, it makes sense to distract yourself and try to focus on being in the present moment, but at the same time, like fertility treatments, it becomes a slog.

    I’m enjoying seeing the “other” as in “not extreme crazy stories” being portrayed to a broader audience. You are the perfect spokesperson!

  5. What do you wish you’d known in the early days of your adoption? What advice would you give to someone just starting out on the adoption road?

    I am happy you’ve posed these questions and I am glad to see such a positive response to your website. I don’t think it’s possible to every fully research all the facets of adoption but it’s so wonderful to see so many sources out there to help along the way 🙂 Everyone wants their child to feel accepted and not grow up with an inner turmoil caused by the adoption. Adoption truly is a journey and I appreciate everyone who is sharing their experience to help make this process less intimidating! Thank you 🙂

  6. Here from the future via Time Warp Tuesday and glad to get to revisit this post and crib sheet with you. I recall when you posted it earlier this year, but for some reason never got around to reading and commenting. I am not surprised they asked you to do this or how helpful the information you shared is. As I often notice, so much of the advice you share about the adoption process and parenting after adopting can be applied to other situations and experiences in life, when we are waiting and/or striving to be good parents to our children. Thank you!

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