Category Archives: Adoptee

Articles that explore the viewpoint of adoptees, as well as ideas of special concern to parents who are raising an adopted child.

#flipthescript 7: Hold On

Anne Heffron, author of the newly-released must-read memoir You Don’t Look Adopted, kicks of this year’s #flipthescript series, in which adoptees take over the microphone.

adoptees flipthescriptImage: Tracy Hammond

So Why Was I Crying?

I am going to visit some of my birth father’s family for the first time next week and my family is letting me go. No one is saying they are afraid they will lose me. No one is saying they wish I’d just be happy with the family I have. No one is saying they are afraid I will like the new family better than my old family. They don’t seem to care. They never call. And that makes me think that maybe, just as I suspected, maybe I was never a “real” Heffron after all even though I feel real, and sometimes I feel numbly sad when I think about where I am now: in this gray area between families–I don’t seem to squarely belong in either.

Continue reading #flipthescript 7: Hold On

The Good Adoptee

Suzanne Bachner’s award-winning show, The Good Adoptee, starring Anna Bridgforth, will tour Connecticut this fall to help garner support for restoring Connecticut adoptees’ access to their original birth certificates.

The tour runs October 22 to December 9, coinciding with National Adoption Awareness Month, and will benefit Access Connecticut‘s adoptee rights efforts. Each performance will include a post-show Talk Back with creator Suzanne Bachner and actress Anna Bridgforth .

the good adoptee, courtesy access connecticutThe tour is cosponsored by Access Connecticut and Calo Programs. ⇑ Click for tix!

Access Connecticut President and adoptee Karen Caffrey interviews Suzanne Bachner about what inspired her to write The Good Adoptee and the challenges and rewards of bringing her personal story to the public stage.

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“You Don’t Look Adopted”

Anne Heffron is a highly gifted writer. In fact, she’s spent decades teaching writing to others, amid her own struggles around identity, brokenness, self-destructive habits, and conflicting emotions about her own mother (it’s mere coincidence that my last post was on the Happy/Sad of adoption). Her memoir and first book, You Don’t Look Adopted, was published four months ago (though Anne is already an accomplished screenwriter), and I have just recently begun reading it.

anne heffron's memoirWriting her memoir — finally — about the things most pressing but most difficult to talk about is but one of the therapies Anne has pursued in her quest for wholeness and self-worth.

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Kohl’s Adoption Video Brings Out the Either/Or Brigade

As part of its #AllTogetherNow campaign, Kohl’s features 19 year-old Raymond and his reunion with his birth mom after 17 years apart. Raymond finds he has a sister, born exactly 10 years after he was.

Both Raymond and his birth mother have responded to comments on YouTube.

Pick a side, Raymond.

Currently there are 148 comments. A common theme among many of them originates in the Either/Or mindset of the closed adoption era. Either she is your real mom or the other woman is. Which part of yourself will you embrace, Raymond, and which will you deny?

  • “I hate this add [sic]. The importance he puts on his biological family is a slap in the face of the people who raised him.”

Continue reading Kohl’s Adoption Video Brings Out the Either/Or Brigade