Category Archives: Uncategorized

Out and about

It’s spring here in the northern hemisphere, things are warming up and people are getting out and reacquainted with their neighbors.


I’ve been out and about, too. Here are a few places I’ve visited. Wanna come? Stroll with me.

1. Melissa Ford — of the just-released novel Measure of Love (which I’ve already loaded onto my Kindle) — is doing me the great honor of hosting a virtual book club for my book, The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole (early reviews are coming in and it’s so exciting). More on how to participate and to sign up here.

To answer the obvious questions that you’ll have after you click over: no, you don’t have to be barren, and no, you don’t have to be a bi+ch to sign up (but it’s also OK if you are).

In a nutshell, to participate, you (a) get and read my book — sorry, the publisher isn’t able to tell me when the e-book format will be available, so for now it’s hardback only, (b) send one question to Melissa that you’d like the group to discuss, and (c) write your own post on May 9 answering the questions that others have posed.

I hope you join us.

2. I had an articleLori Holden in The Huffington Post (my first there) published in The Huffington Post. Thank you People magazine.

“In the moments of my children’s adoption — like the moment of Jenna [Wolfe]‘s baby’s conception — a split was created in our children between their biology and their biography. Being open about our children’s origins is an effective way to heal this split and help them integrate their identities. Instead of hoping our children would never question their heritage, we assumed they would, so we (…more…)

Respectful discussion welcome there.

3. Kymberli of The Smartness has launched a new and happy site, Jump: 1,001 Reasons To Be Happy — and mine is #2! The whole site is a great pick-me-up.

“Did you win the lottery? Find an extra nugget in your 10-piece? Joys big and small make you wanna Jump, Jump. If you find a Reason to Be Happy, take a Jump! Shot photo and share…share happiness.

4. I received some photos from the Parenthood for Me gala I keynoted at last month. An aside: founder Erica (in the center) joyously welcomed her baby girl into the world this week. It’s gratifying to bear witness to the bee-yoo-tiful unfolding of her story.

Speaking of stories, that’s Carolyn Savage on the left. I recently finished reading her book, Inconceivable: The Medical Mistake, The Baby We Couldn’t Keep, and Our Choice to Deliver the Ultimate Gift. It’s the mark of a gifted storyteller when you know how the tale turns out but you’re riveted anyway. You’ll see why Carolyn was the perfect person to write the foreword for my book, based on the one-in-a-gazillion experience she’s had.

Back to the gala. Adoption STAR, who made my appearance at the event possible, recapped the event, and I’m sharing some pix with you here.

Lori Holden keynotes at Parenthood for Me gala

I hope you enjoyed strolling the ‘hoods with me! Happy spring weekend to you — and wishes for a relaxing amble through the leaves to my southern hemisphere friends.

On luck

Just in time for St Patrick’s Day, we’re revisiting posts about luck for Time Warp Tuesday, the monthly blog hop offered by Kathy at Bereaved and Blessed.

(Which, because I don’t like malted beverages, gives me much more to work with than would revisiting posts about green beer.)

Kathy says:

The symbols associated with the holiday, including shamrocks and leprechauns, are often thought of as lucky. Choose a post from your archives in which you wrote about luck. Then write a new post about why you chose the post and what has happened in your life since.

I’ve closed comments here because I don’t have a lot to add to a post that encapsulates my philosophy and life-view, which means there’s nothing to comment on here. So click over to The Tao of Luck to see a post that shows how I try to ride the swells of luck. Would love your comment there (if you missed it the first time around).

riding the wave of luck

See Time Warp Tuesday to read more posts about luck, and maybe even add your own (even if it’s no longer Tuesday).

The journals: teens and twenties

Longtime readers may remember that I’m a natural-born documentarian — witness this array of journals that are in a Rubbermaid container under my bed. Each day of my life since high school is accessible with a simple lifting of a bin lid.

Justine recently excavated some of her old journals, going back in time. I decided to kick up some dust and do the same. Be prepared to cringe just a little.

journals generic

High school: [Nothing too interesting, except that I kept a running list of boys I kissed. It numbered six by the time I left for college. And then it got longer and longer...I prayed to Jesus a lot in those years for certain boys to like me.]

College: Being only 17, I look at old people and feel that I’ll never get old. Then I realize that this feeling is a result of my inexperience and youth. This realization, however, shows a certain degree of wisdom that is normally acquired with age and experience.

Still in college: A guy. If I have to look for him this hard, he must not be worth finding.

After college graduation, contemplating a marriage proposal: Lately, I’ve thought I really wouldn’t mind dying. I don’t want to face all these decisions. Also, I’ve lost so much of my career ambitions and feel so purposeless. Is it going to take a brush with death for me to appreciate life? God, what’s wrong with me? This should be the happiest part of my life!

Two months before a wedding date: There are three ways to go off the high dive: (1) kicking and screaming, with someone pushing you; (2) “What the hell” — kind of dragging but on your own accord; or (3) “I can’t wait!” — real excited. Same with getting married. I was at #1 a few weeks go. When we set a date and until now, I’m at #2. Maybe by the wedding date I’ll be at #3.

[Note: this was before I met Roger. Later on I experienced #3.]

Challenger: When I heard the news I really didn’t get how tragic and devastating the space shuttle disaster would be. I know my initial blasé didn’t cause those 7 deaths, but still. Do I feel guilty? I can’t tell the difference between what I do feel and what I should feel.  It does feel good, though, to be part of a mourning nation — we’ve all forgotten other differences for the moment and joined together.

Age 26: This year was tough — bad break-up, company folded, the deaths of my cousin and my dog. Yet I feel I’m on the verge of something great. My upcoming year in Japan and the guts to go do it is a positive step. I want to (as always) get closer to Jesus, reduce my dependence on others for self-worth, tone up and survive the loneliness, calling on reserves of faith. I’m looking forward!

Living in Japan, missing another Mr Wrong: What do you do when reality cannot live up to past memories or future fantasies, and someone’s absence is greater than their presence?

Age 29, in grad school: Each year goes faster than those previous. Maybe in this coming one I’ll find love. Please, Jesus.


Next up? The 30s (if I find anything worthwhile in that decade).

What’s in your journal?

 Image courtesy of Jomphong /