Creme de la Creme

Tension release: From cranky to compassionate

February 9, 2012

Tessa and I had been on edge with each other all day. Finally in the early evening I invited her to cuddle with me on the couch. “Neither of us slept well last night. I think we’re just tired,” I offered an explanation why we were both cranky. “But mom, YOU don’t have a hurt […]

My son processes a new layer of his adoptedness

October 10, 2011
Thumbnail image for My son processes a new layer of his adoptedness

Adam Pertman told the story (which I’m paraphrasing, perhaps badly) at last month’s Open Adoption Symposium of his teenage son, playing a handheld game in his room one night. Trying to keep the lines of communication open, Adam stepped into his son’s room and asked, “Son, how often do you think about adoption?” Without looking […]


December 1, 2010

For a teeny-weeny double helix, DNA sure packs a punch. A couple of readers asked earlier this year what I thought about how one’s DNA answers the question “who are you?”  — especially in light of adoption. This was back when Who Do You Think You Are? debuted on NBC (it is scheduled to return […]

A moment in open adoption parenting

November 3, 2009

Tessa was distraught, after a Halloween party, for not getting the nod for a sleepover at her aunt’s house. The excitement of the kid-oriented haunted house, the disappointment about the sleepover and a sugar high made for a meltdown. I got her into the car and she continued to wail about how mean her dad […]