In the decade since I first heard about this newfangled thing called open adoption, I have feared it, researched it, walked into it, lived it, breathed it, cursed it, worked through it, appreciated it — even written a book about it (see sidebar). Here are some posts along the journey. So far.
Parenting in open adoption
The Open Adoption grid: Why I think of open adoption as a grid rather than a spectrum, and why openness is not the same as contact.
What does “‘real” mean? My daughter utters those dreaded words.
“What if I weren’t adopted?” I abide with my daughter while she wonders.
Hotel Rwanda and open adoption parenting: extraordinary = extra + ordinary.
“Why did she give me away?” My son asks tough questions. Insights to how to respond when your child begins wondering about birth parents.
“Am I a bastard, Mom?”: my readers help me talk about the B word.
How I embraced open adoption: Is “Just embrace” what comes after “Just adopt”?
Head and heart: how open adoption has changed me.
The Family Toes: My first day as a mom, I feel like a fraud. Clearly there has been a mistake.
On DNA: Nature? or Nurture?
Two women, one daughter: how Crystal, my daughter’s first mom, and I share a daughter.
- Part 1: Considering Joe
- Part 2: Telling Tessa
- Part 3: The horrible wait
- Part 4: The meeting
- Part 5: Crash
- Part 6: What was the what
Relationships in the triad
Normalize it! My response to criticism about contact between child and birth parent.
Letters from my kids 2031: What I’d like for my children to be able to say about the way I conducted myself.
Books, Workshops, Advice, etc
The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole: written with Crystal, my daughter’s birth mom.
Adoption: The Long View: podcast exploring the complexities of adoption with a variety of adoption voices and experts.