Tag Archives: human condition

What Enlightened Self-Interest in Adoption Can Teach Us About Race Relations

Gosh, is it scary to talk about anything race related. But I’m going to zoom out and talk first about things that are power imbalance related, using adoption, political theory, and the enlightened self-interest of sharing cake.

chocolate cake & power imbalance

Power Shifts in Jim Gritter’s Hosting & Guesting Model

Jim Gritter, a pioneering social worker for open adoption, suggests in Hospitious Adoption (if you can’t find it to buy, try your library) that people in adoption relationships should take cues from the hospitality industry. Think about what makes a good guest. Think about what makes a good host. And then when you find yourself in one of those roles, take on the mindset of a good guest or a good host. (I submit this means to be able to imagine yourself in the place of the other and to then follow the Golden Rule.)

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Answer Me This: Right vs Privilege

What makes something a right as opposed to a privilege?

Edited at bottom.

I’ve been thinking about the essential difference between a right and a privilege for awhile and can’t seem to pinpoint an answer. The two words arise often during election seasons, which we are between at the moment, so maybe this is a good time to talk about it without heated rhetoric.

What Makes a Right a Right?

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Answer Me This: After Death

What do you think happens after death? Do you believe in a heaven and hell? An afterlife? Ashes to ashes? Reincarnation? A combination? Or something else?

What do you think happens after a person dies?

extinguished candle symbolizing death

I’m not asking for any particular reason. It’s just that I find myself wondering about stuff while driving or showering, and my next thought is: what do my friends think about this? So I’m asking.

After A Person Dies…

I envision that the reunion of the soul and Source is absolutely, simply, magnificently divine,  a sweet, long-awaited, and inevitable coming-back-together.

My theory is that a person’s essence (spirit, soul) returns to Source and becomes undifferentiated from the essence of All. Like a drop of water (discrete) returning to a vast ocean (continuous).

I favor the holographic idea of the drop and the ocean. The whole contains all the parts AND each part contains the whole.

So I don’t really believe in reincarnation, per se (because the person’s spirit is no longer separate/discrete). Nor in Grandma looking down on you.

In a sense, then, every body IS a reincarnation of All energies. The drop IS the ocean.

And the essence of Grandma Marshmallow really IS everywhere.

But those who love her (or orbit her) are most able to resonate with her energy, present still in so many tangible ways.

What do you think happens after a person dies?

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This post is part of #MicroblogMondays? Whazzat? A post that’s not too long. Head to Stirrup Queens to join the fun.

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Lori Holden's book coverLori Holden, mom of a teen son and a teen daughter, blogs from Denver. Her book, The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole, is available through your favorite online bookseller and makes a thoughtful anytime gift for the adoptive families in your life.