Book | Workshops | Media

Lori Holden's book on open adoption

Bring Lori’s “Don’t Split the Baby” Workshop to You

Lori speaks occasionally at adoption agencies to help clients understand how to create and sustain a vibrant and child-centered open adoption. She is also available to speak or keynote at adoption conferences. Inquire or arrange.

Praise for Lori Holden’s Open Adoption Workshop

From Randie Randie Bencanann, LCSW, Co-Director of Adoption Connection in San Francisco:

We were so fortunate to have Lori Holden, author of The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption do a presentation for pre- and post-adoption clients at our agency. She is a dynamic and knowledgeable presenter with a passionate and compassionate view of the role of openness in adoption. I was particularly impressed by her ability to see all sides of the adoption triad, be realistic about such complicated relationships but also be optimistic and inspirational in her approach to creating the best possible outcomes for a healthy open adoption.  She encouraged audience participation and was responsive and sensitive to all.

If the proof is in the pudding, or the sale of the book is evidence of a great evening,  we sold all of the books we ordered and the comments were extremely favorable. I would recommend Lori as a presenter to anyone involved in the adoption world.

From Katie Stallman, LICSW, CGE, Seattle Regional Supervisor of Open Adoption & Family Services

The Seattle Open Adoption &Family Services community was thrilled to welcome Lori on October 1st.  Lori’s activities, personal stories, and grid analysis on four different styles of “openness” led to greater awareness and clarity as to what the adults truly need to do in relationships with children to both acknowledge and “heal the split between biology and biography.” Our community, already well versed in the benefits of openness and poised to enter a values-based open adoption, left the evening with even more wisdom and self-awareness courtesy of Lori’s candid style. Lori’s ability to reflect, use self-talk, and then act based on the best interests of her children left all feeling inspired and more equipped to reflect for themselves.

From Katie Woodward, LCSW, Portland Counselor & Clinical Supervisor at Open Adoption & Family Services

Months after attending Lori Holden’s workshop in Portland, OR, prospective adoptive parents at our agency continue to reference her teachings as a source of insight and courage in their open adoption journey. The family structure activity in particular, in which she asked people to embody the role of adoptive parent, birth parent, adoptee, and extended family, left a lasting impact. Through this exercise, our clients were able to consider what others in their adoption constellation might be experiencing. This level of empathy and Lori’s thoughtful way of guiding the exercise enhanced participants’ understanding and compassion towards one another.

Additionally, Lori’s diagram portraying degrees of contact and open-heartedness has been referenced numerous times as something that was not only helpful, but empowering for adoptive parents as they step into the unknown aspects of their relationship. Lori’s workshop was a refreshing reminder for all of us that we are in control of our ability to be open-hearted.

Praise for Lori Holden’s book

“Those who long to see adoption done in a big-hearted way will be encouraged by her hospitable words.” — James L. Gritter, MSW, author of Hospitious Adoption

“Not only is Lori Holden an acknowledged thought leader in the area of open adoption, she is also truly beloved by the men and women who look to her for guidance, humor and balance when considering this route for themselves. Her book will be cherished by many and inspirational to all.” — Corey Whelan, patient advocate and author, The American Fertility Association

“This is one wise book. Sure it’s full of the practicalities of open adoption—the whys and, most useful, the hows, but it is the spirit of this book that truly shines. It is this spirit of openness — Lori calls it the heartset/mindset that ultimately needs to guide us as parents. I’d love for this to be read by every adoptive parents and expectant parent at the beginning of the adoption journey. — Dawn Davenport, host of the top rated national radio show- Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption and Infertility, executive director of Creating a Family

“The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption covers what this adoptee wishes my parents had known, and beyond. The definitive post-modern guide to enlightened adoption.  –Marcy Axness, PhD, parent coach and author of Parenting for Peace

See more endorsements and reviews on Amazon.

Speaking dates 2013

  • March 9: Rochester, NY
  • September 26: Denver, CO
  • October 1: Seattle, WA
  • October 2: Portland, OR
  • October 3: Eugene, OR
  • October 17: San Francisco, CA
  • November 3: Denver, CO
  • Dates soon announced for 2014

For workshop descriptions and details, please see the Amazon event page or contact me directly.

Media appearances

  • Listen To Your Mother Show: “The Day I Earned My Mom Badge.”

8 thoughts on “Book | Workshops | Media”

  1. Lori (and Crystal) – I’m about halfway through and oh my god, I LOVE this book!!!! What an awesome resource to have as I’m starting out on our open adoption path. This book makes me feel okay with everything – that being open is really what’s best for our daughter and our family. Thank you!

  2. Hi Lori! I just registered to attend the Seattle event next week. And I just ordered your book. I am so excited to read it and hear you speak and meet you! Yay!

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Open adoption parenting & mindful living