Who is Anti-Adoption and What Can We Learn from Them?
If you’ve ever been in a cross-triad adoption group, you’ve probably encountered someone who seems vehemently, angrily, staunchly anti-adoption. Some say there is NO circumstance in which adoption is called for. It’s just that devastating, that inhumane, that unnecessary.
When coming across such a tirade, you probably think that the rational choices would be to 1) engage to tell that wackadoo all the reasons she’s wrong, or 2) click the red X on the window before any of the venom burns your eyes, your heart.
The adoption process is not for the faint of heart. It requires big things of ordinary people. Running that gauntlet caused me to develop three new abilities, each which would eventually come in handy years later.
Lesson 1: Calm the Chatter
The Wait. I found all the doing of the adoption process to be the easy part. Get those fingerprints. Write those essays. Clean the house and host the homestudy appointments. Attend the classes and work up that adoption profile.
But when all the doing was over, the harder part started: doing nothing. Just waiting. Just sitting with all that anxiety over all the unknowns. Would it happen? How would it happen? Would something go wrong? How many things could go wrong? LET ME ENVISION ALL OF THEM.
My frantic mind, locked on a goal, got really good at conceiving of every possible thing that could go awry, monkey-chatter taking over as I moved through my days.