Category Archives: Very Important Posts

VIPs: Very Important Posts from November 2011

Very Important PostsHere is a collection of posts from the past few weeks that have made me think long after I read them. Click over to see if they are meaningful to you, too.

Heather gets a double nod this month, first with Overlapping Family and also with Why I Do This Part 3. In the first post, Heather notes whom her son counts as kin — and it may surprise you how expansive he is. In the latter post Heather explains why she spends her limited free time creating connections via Open Adoption Bloggers and The Adoption Interview Project, and why not all post-adoption support can or should come from professionals. It contains an excellent analogy about the role of the adoption professional — click over to read.

In considering openness with her son’s birth parents, Geo-Chick reveals a “big family secret” in My Mental Journey to Open Adoption. Further, she says that “the longer we waited and the more comfortable I became with the idea of regular visits and continuity, the more uncomfortable I became with the idea of being chosen by expectant parents who did not want contact.” After becoming mom to Baby X, she envisions in this post her role and tasks as as his mom: “being in an open adoption means that you have to remove yourself from the equation.” An interesting path from her own childhood to the one she wants for her son.

Christine from Welcome to My Brain says, “I witnessed something painful and beautiful this week.” In Making Things Right Christine reports on a conflict in a Facebook group that could have been a train wreck but wasn’t . Because I’ve witnessed and been party to such public conflicts, I liked the ending on this one, and that Christine thought it was notable.

And lastly, in a post about post-infertility parenting, The Allure and Tyranny of the White Picket Fence, JJiraffe ponders “My whole life I feel I craved this life of a suburban home with two kids and a husband. I certainly busted my ass to be here. So why is it so hard sometimes to BE here?”  Good question, and good comments.


Be on the lookout for what you consider Very Important Posts during the month of December — I’d love to know your nominations for the next edition of VIPs.

VIPs: Very Important Posts from October 2011

Very Important PostsOnce in awhile I’ll be listing here some Very Important Posts that are worth sharing. I’ll collect them over time and post when the list hits critical mass.

The inaugural VIP list includes these posts, all with the theme of Adoption, which is appropriate because November is dedicated to adoption awareness.

Adoption Awareness Month: Can We Heal? My new author-crush, Jennifer Lauck, is spending National Adoption Awareness Month offering teleseminars for adoptees, led by various therapists, including Nancy Verrier. The first session is today, so click over soon if this sounds like something you want to know more about. “Adoptees are too often shoved into a corner, most often a place we put ourselves. We are the silent sufferers and we are the adaptors.”

Why Christians Need to Be Aware of How They Speak About Birth Parents. Jenna at The Chronicles of Muchkinland was in an audience of 8000 women when a highly regarded speaker put at least one of her stylish boots in her mouth. Jenna calls her out on speaking disparagingly:  “Please think before you speak on a stage. Your words hurt me, and I wasn’t alone. Your words run the risk of hurting children in the future, one of whom might be yours someday. Think, Lisa. I’m a real, faithful, hurting child of God who made a decision that altered the course of my life. I am not less than you, and neither is any other birth mother or father.”

How We Got Here. With sadness but no bitterness, first mother LisaAnne of Living through Today explains how the adoption she was thought would be open got slammed shut as soon as her daughter’s parents got what they wanted. “You see, while I was pregnant, we talked all the time. Brit’s mom went to every single doctor’s appt with me. We were great friends. We didn’t make a plan, because honestly I never ever dreamed I would need one. I had made a new friend.  She seemed like she was one of my sisters.  We got along great.  There was absolutely nothing that made me think that would ever change.”

Ten Tips for New Moms. Aren’t we all suckers for lists? Harriett from See Theo Run writes 10 things she learned in her first year of being a mom. She had me at Number One: “Your new baby gives you carte blanche to bail on everything and anything. Take advantage! Don’t explain, just don’t show up.  And for goodness sake, let go of your A-type obsession with being on time.”

Falling Away. In this post from Everyone Shut Up But Me, Jeni finds freedom from pain she’s carried that stems from rejection by her original mother. It’s a post of resilience and hope. “i can become whatever and whoever i need and want to be without her.  i can do anything and everything without her.  i truly wanted to do all of it with her, but that wasn’t meant to be.”


Have you signed up yet for the book tour for Found: a Memoir by Jennifer Lauck?