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Observations of a Control Freak

Anyone who blogs is probably a control freak. We write to bring order to chaos. To understand the mystifying. To get people to do something, even just to agree or disagree.

As any of the three people who live with me will attest, I fit nicely into the CF category.

Yesterday evening while driving home, I noticed a stunning sunset over the mountains. The clouds had mercifully rolled in, and created a canvas on which the sun painted various shades of pinks, blues, purples, and all hues in between.

This sunset happened without any impetus from me.

So I started thinking about other amazing processes and events that I don’t have to influence. They pretty much happen when I just go about my business. Here they are in all their random glory:

  • My digestion, respiration and other bodily functions happen without a lot of controlling on my part.
  • When I go to a store expecting to buy certain things, 99% of the time they are there.
  • Neighborhood streets are clean and passable.
  • Trees shade my house.
  • Water evaporates, becomes precipitation, hits the earth only to evaporate again.
  • My husband comes home every night.
  • My children keep growing taller and wiser, no matter how I might thwart their efforts.
  • Sunrises and sunsets like this happen all over the world every single day!

Truly, I am part of something much grander than I. I can relax. I don’t have to try so hard.

Now if I can just remember that today. All day. Every moment.

Or is that too controlling?

Lori Holden, mom of a young adult daughter and a young adult son, writes from Denver. She was honored as an Angel in Adoption® by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute.

Find Lori’s books on her Amazon Author page, and catch episodes of Adoption: The Long View wherever you get your podcasts.

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