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Ep 509 of Adoption: The Long View with Dr JaeRan KIm and Patrick Armstrong about the Adoptee Consciousness Model.

What Parents Need to Know about the Adoptee Consciousness Model

Coming to Consciousness: Will They or Won't They?

When our adoptees are young, we cannot anticipate how, when, and if they will process their adoptedness someday as adults. Such processing may not even be on our radar, if we have heard nothing to counter common adoption narratives like adoption is no big deal – just parent ‘em like they’re your own or love will get us through everything.

For adoptees, figuring out their identity with the added layer of adoption, and the eventual realization that in order to land in this family, they first had to leave that family, are aspects of their lives that require extra thought, attention, and integration. An adoptee has underlying currents in their life story that may – or may not – bubble to the surface, but exist, nonetheless. If our adoptees do one day dip their toes in that current, oh, how we hope it will be a gentle and smooth journey for them! Don’t all parents want their child to have an easy time of the big things in life? Some things we parents can’t control, but some we can, at least, influence.

Ep 509 of Adoption: The Long View with Dr JaeRan KIm and Patrick Armstrong about the Adoptee Consciousness Model.
Adoption: The Long View
509: Dr JaeRan Kim & Patrick Armstrong on Adoptees Coming to Consciousness
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What might we do to support such processing early in their lives, when everything involving separation and attachment is outsized in the scheme of things?

As we wind down this podcast, which will conclude at the end of this year, I am so excited to welcome two thought-leaders to talk with us about the Adoptee Consciousness Model. It was conceived by a team of adoptee-scholars including Dr JaeRan Kim, here to talk with us. Many adoptees have related to it, including Patrick Armstrong, also here with us, who unfurled on social media how the Adoptee Consciousness Model was playing out for him in his own lead-up to becoming a first-time father.

The Adoptee Consciousness Model: Status Quo, Rupture, Dissonance, Expansion, Forgiveness & Repair.

Just like you may already be thinking of ways to support your child in the future, like saving for college, you are going to want to better understand what is in store for adoptees who embark on this journey because today, right now, you are helping to set a foundation for the integration and processing they may eventually do at some stage in their life. What will you one day wish you’d known about setting that foundation now?

AboutJaeRan Kim, PhD, Creator of the Adoptee Consciousness Model

JaeRan Kim, Phd, MSW, (she/hers) is an Associate Professor in the School of Social Work and Criminal Justice at the University of Washington at Tacoma, located on the traditional territories of the Puyallup peoples.

Prior to completing her doctoral degree, she worked with foster and adopted children and families and with adults with disabilities in residential care. JaeRan’s research is focused on the wellbeing of adoptees, exploring disability, race, and transnational experiences for adoptees. Her research includes the racial, ethnic, and adoption socialization practices of Korean-American adoptee parents, the use of out-of-home care for adoptees (residential treatment, group homes, and foster care), and adult intercountry adoptees with adoption displacement experiences.

JaeRan’s research also explores the preparation and training of professional social workers. As a public scholar, JaeRan is passionate about engaging in community-based projects; her blog Harlow’s Monkey, which focuses on the transracial/transnational adoptee experience, is one of the longest-running transracial adoption blogs in the United States.

"We call them touchpoints, not stages. We don’t want to give the idea that there is a linear progression for coming to consciousness." -- JaeRan Kim, PhD, in ep509 of Adoption: The Long View
"In adoptee-only spaces, we were talking about our moments of Rupture, Dissonance, and Expansion. It was cool to have these conversations in real time." -- JaeRan Kim, PhD, in ep509 of Adoption: The Long View

About Patrick Armstrong, Applier of the Adoptee Consciousness Model

Patrick Armstrong, (he/him) is a passionate storyteller, critical conversationalist, and proud Asian American adoptee. He is the host of the award-winning podcasts Conversation Piece, about the missing pieces of the conversations we’re already having, and The Janchi Show, a show that explores and celebrates the experiences and stories of Korean adoptees everywhere.

Patrick is also a keynote speaker and moderator, having worked with clients including Purdue University, The Indianapolis Colts, and Indiana Sports Corp. Patrick currently lives in Indianapolis with his wife, their son, and their cat.

"If our parents can build out a runway when we’re 5, 10, 15 years old, it would give us the opportunity to soften the landing of the Rupture." -- Patrick Armstrong, ep509 of Adoption: The Long View
"Despite the idyllic nature of my adoption, I still experienced things that caused me to create a mask and to reject parts of myself." -- Patrick Armstrong in ep509 of Adoption: The Long View

Ep 509: the Adoptee Consciousness Model

In ep 509, JaeRan explains what the Adoptee Consciousness Model is and ways it can play out for adoptees. Is it the same as adoptees “coming out of the fog”? Well, yes and no, as both JaeRan and Patrick share.

"It’s hard when parents make it feel unsafe for adoptees to explore their adoptee identity." -- JaeRan Kim, PhD, in ep509 of Adoption: The Long View
"If you ended the episode right now, it would be a great episode. I’d listen to it a hundred times. My brain is movin’ and groovin’." -- Patrick Armstrong in ep509 of Adoption: The Long View

We hear about the journeys to consciousness for both guests, and some of the ways the journey can be launched. 

If you dread the day that your adoptee leaves Status Quo to embark on their adventure, or if you can hardly wait to support them when they do, this interview is a must-hear for adoptive parents.

"Adult adoptees will walk away from the relationship if they don’t feel supported. Estrangement is a really sad outcome because the whole idea of adoption is to provide permanency and forever families." -- JaeRan Kim, PhD, in ep509 of Adoption: The Long View
"You can dread your adoptee coming to their adoptee consciousness all you want. It’s going to happen. Ask yourself: what is behind your dread?" -- Patrick Armstrong on ep509 of Adoption: The Long View

Show Notes for ep 509 with Dr JaeRan Kim & Patrick Armstrong

Dr JaeRan Kim

Patrick Armstrong

How to Tune In Regularly

Lori Holden of Adoption The Long ViewYou can find Adoption: The Long View on Adopting.com and on these other platforms.

A new episode comes out the first Friday of the month. Thank you for sharing, subscribing, and rating this episode wherever you listen!

Lori Holden, mom of a young adult daughter and a young adult son, writes from Denver. She was honored as an Angel in Adoption® by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute.

Find Lori’s books on her Amazon Author page, and catch episodes of Adoption: The Long View wherever you get your podcasts.

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