Get This Guide in the Hands of Your Fellow Book Clubbers!
So many groups have let us know they are reading Adoption Unfiltered in community—adoption agencies, parent support communities, adoptee support communities, and book clubs. We could not be more excited about this!
Some of the prime goals Sara, Kelsey and I have for our collaboration are to educate on the effects of separation and unresolved grief, to look beyond adoption’s win-win narrative, and to understand the heal through authenticity and connection. That people are dialoguing about these themes while connecting with each other is our dream come true.
Here’s our letter to you from p2 of our free download:
Dear Readers,
Thank you you for choosing to read Adoption Unfiltered in community. Whether your book club is discussing adoption from a singular perspective (such as an adoptee-only book club) or from multiple perspectives, we are excited that you’ve decided to explore the full spectrum of adoption experiences and reimagine how we might better serve adoptees and their families.
Included in this guide are more questions than you will probably get to. We invite you to pick and choose those that resonate and use our prompts to bring out questions of your own.
It’s possible that Sara, Kelsey, and/or Lori, solo or in combination, may be able to attend a 30-minute segment of your book club discussion by Zoom.
Please message authors(at)adoptionunfiltered(dot)com with your invitation.
We are pleased to have you join us on the quest to unfilter adoption!
Sara Easterly | Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard | Lori Holden
Four Features of the Adoption Unfiltered Guide
Feature 1: Author Q&A
The first section offers author Q&As, like Sara explaining her most difficult chapter to write. Like Kelsey sharing what it was like to write as a birth mom currently in an open adoption. And me telling what it has been like to create in a 3-way collaboration.
Feature 2: Discussion Questions
Next are several pages of prompts for individual thought and group discussion.
Here are 8 categories and sample questions:
- Introductory questions: Where do you fall in the adoption constellation?
- Personal Experience questions: Do you think adoption is God’s plan?
- Questions for (adult) Adoptees: Do you feel as though you know your complete adoption story?
- Questions for Birth Parents/Family: What is your relationship with grief, and how has it ebbed and flowed over time?
- Questions for Adoptive Parents: How does your own attachment history impact the ways you react/respond to your child’s grief?
- Questions for Adoption Professionals: Do you think the authors were too hard on the adoption industry? Not hard enough?
- Questions about Impact on the Wider Society: What should informed consent look like for expectant parents and adoptive parents?
- Other questions: Each of the authors addressed the intersection of religion and adoption. What do you think of these three viewpoints?
Feature 3: 🎵🎻🎹 Three Playlists
Each of us compiled a playlist in accordance with Dr Gordon Neufeld’s observation that “Music is an emotional playground. It’s a way to access sadness for which we have no words.”
- Sara’s list of songs that evoke sadness include Avril Levigne, The Lumineers, and Hillsong UNITED.
- Kelsey’s playlist to tap into tough emotions includes Mac Miller, Nina Simone, and Overcoats.
- My list includes songs by artists like Regina Spektor, Daniel Lanois, and Pearl Jam.
Check out the links to our playlists anytime you you want to drain your own grief bucket a little, and consider building your own list of evocative songs. In the coming months, I’ll be sharing the story behind each song I chose.
Feature 4: 🍴🥗🥘 Three Recipes
What else do people do in community besides discuss books, while discussing books?
Eat!
Our last offering in the Adoption Unfiltered guide is a recipe that’s special to each of us and to our people. Food is not only for nourishment, but also for connection.
Bonus Feature: If you invite us, we may Zoom
In case you missed it in our letter above, we are open to attending a portion of you book club gathering. You can invite any of us or all of us to join your group virtually.
It’s possible that Sara, Kelsey, and/or Lori, solo or in combination, may be able to attend a 30-minute segment of your book club discussion by Zoom. Please message authors(at)adoptionunfiltered(dot)com with your invitation.
Those who have already taken advantage of this say they have enjoyed asking us questions directly.
Much Gratitude to my Own Adoption Book Club
In 2013, a local adoption book club invited me to attend as an author for a discussion my first book, The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption. I loved it, joined it, and am still attending today.
All of the members are adoptive parents, and several of them are also adoptees. Our conversations about adoption-themed books are always rich and deep.
One of the reasons it was important to me to have an accompanying book club guide for Adoption Unfiltered is that I’d love for everyone to have access to what we have in our adoption book club.
Many thanks to Caron, Jenn, and Colleen for their help with questions for this guide. When you, dear reader, download this guide for your own group, you’ll be benefiting from Caron’s, Jenn’s, and Colleen’s thoughtfulness and curiosity.
